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Things Medstudent are sorry for

Hi,I am a medstudent.

And this is a long list that I would like to say sorry for.


To begin with,Sorry…
1.to both of my parents, because they thought they had already graduated with their expenses but had to work harder due to our post grad schooling.
2.to My mother, who want me to accompany her in the salon or her check-up because she feels something weird.
3.to my father,who wants me to put the christmas lights with him or go biking with him
4.To my brother, because i have failed to watch his mass demonstration 
5.to my sister whose pubertal stories I have not heard because I just want to catch up sleep.
6. To my pet, because I can no longer bathe you at regular interval nor to play with you or walk you at every night
7.to my boyfriend,who wants to see me but i cannot go out with him because we have shiftings the next day
8.To my gymbuddies, whom I have no longer trained with because I have report the tom
9.To my gym trainers, for seeing me getting my bellies constricted by my uniform
10. To my previous workmates and batchmates, because I was absent during last friday night’s dinner,as always.i was so sleepy and i have manuals to finish.
11.To my bed,because I can no longer lie on top of you,and that i have started become clingy with the chair,table, even at wall posts or toilet bowls.
12.To my relatives,because I missed your birthdays and was late for the reunions
13. To my artistic inclination,because instead of getting the paintbrush and the canvas, I had to prepare some transes.
14.To my Shakesperian side, because instead of writing out or blogging what is on my mind I had to finalize writing the case studies. 
15. To my stomach, because I cannot stuff you at the right intervals plus we drink coffee too much and you are now drowned in acid.
16.to my bags,for having you stretched so much from carrying my 2-inched spine books.
17.to my life,because they said I have lost you since i started this whole med journey.Nevertheless,this life,my life, although voluntarily sacrificed, offered and given away, will be ever be so full because of its own way to help save the lives of others.

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Medstudent?Ok,Basahin mo to pag tinatamad ka!

Hindi mo masasabing mahirap ang mahirap unless you experienced it yourself. There will always be difficulty.  Other wise, it will just have the same level of difficulty as the others dahil expected na mahirap sya.Pero,gets kita!

 

Mahirap sya in ways you cannot imagine dahil kalaban mo ang sarili mo.Unang una ay katamaran at procrastination at pangalawa,tao ka lang at may kahinaan.Feeling mo bopols ka na walang laman ang utak, feeling mo walang pumapasok,feeling mo nayurakan na yung pagkatao mo,napanghinaan ka na ng loob.You can never feel ready on your exams but there is no reason for stop.You only have to do your best.

Ang medicine mahirap sya in a way na kailangan specific but broad ang approach.During shiftings, You study bigger scope for just 10 questions per topic. tapos pag association pa,yari kapag uncertain ka sa isa. You study because questions may come anywhere. Questions raised by the professor. Questions raised by books.Questions kahit di naturo.  Questions raised by titas. Questions raised by kapitbahay or ate sa kalsada.kahit medstudent ka palang basta nakaputi ka,expected may explanation ka. (Don’t forget dapat to the level of understanding lang ang pag-eexplain naman diba?hahaha)

Ang pag-aaral is not just passing the shiftings or major exams. (Marami factors ang pagpasa jan,eh. Di lang talino.Swerte din.at Dasal.Sobrang dasal.hahaha) Kaya gets ko kung feel mo na di ka nanalo sa test mong yan.Masakit kasi nag-aral ka?Oo,masakit pero ganon talaga. Life is unfair.Anyway,kung di mo naman makuha ang tama ngayong yung aral mo naman Dapat extended sa boards exam.Sabi nga samin nung Nursing Licensure exam,”hayaan mo na mag-magkali ka ngayon para sa boards tama ka na!”.Haay!!Mag-aral ka na ngayon palang. Learn it by heart. Understand it in a such a way na naiimamapa mo na sa utak mo. And not only that, the real deal is that you have to remind yourself that you will be handling lives: Lives of brothers, sisters, fathers, mothers or a friend of somebody.You will be an instrument of God’s healing hands. Sarap sa pakiramdam diba?
Pero sa ngayon aral ka muna!Aral aral.Di ba calling mo yan?kakayanin mo yan.

Mahirap na nagkamali kasi buhay yan.negligence  yan.litigation hassle pa ,gastos time and abogado.at may mga taong sadyang fault finder kaya dapat tama ang gnagwa mo.

Dapat alam mo,or better yet dapat mas alam mo yan than any other member of health care team. Kasi nga doctor ka,you  must know better. Dapat talaga alam mo. Yes, may specialization ka. Pero sa ngayon,ganyan talaga muna. You need a strong foundation. Train yourself. Kahit di ka magaling, pretend to be. I read one research saying that self-illusion really improves self esteem thus producing better outcomes. Bola -bolahin mo lang sarili mo. (Gustong-gusto mo nga yan eh).

Tell yourself:

Kaya mo yan. Tinatamad ka lang!

Tapusin mo na yan,para mamaya pwede ka na tamarin!

Kapag natapos mo yan,may prize ka.Tulog,dota,kain,FB,movie,date,workout!!!!

Do not be hard on yourself.

In the event na mataas naman nakuha mo, pssst.Pasintabi naman.maging sensitive sa iba.Choose where you will express your happiness dahil baka kung ikaw walang masidlan ng saya eh wala namang masidlan ng lungkot ng iba.

 

 

Eto na,patapos na!If you lose the will to do something, Just think you don’t have an option and you will find yourself doing it anyway!”

May getaway ang barkada?bonding ka muna sa groupmates mo sa report baka bukas mahkontrahan kayo.

May date ka?Makipagdate kanila guyton at junquiera.Isama mo na si snell.Edi,madami ka pa kadate!

Antok ka?matulog ka rin baka naman sa exam ka matulog!!!zzzzzZZ

Walang sukuan,mga par!

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Kamusta na,doktora?

(This is the first time that I will be celebrating the holiday season as a legit doctor aspirant. I say legit doctor aspirant because I am a 1st year medicine student. And getting this education was no piece of cake to me and I stopped being just an aspirant.BUT YES,THANK GOD! )

 

I was asked, “Kamusta na doktora?”(How are you?). All I can say is “good” to cut the long story short. Though,hearing “doktora” is really pleasant to my ears:).

Days before the start of vacation,kana’t kaliwa na ang Christmas parties and get-together,not to mention na kana’t kaliwa narin ang 1st shiftings. Haha. How about excited na ang utak mo na nauna pa magbakasyon? Plus, since we have daily unit test and the major exams for the coming week, we have to dedicate some time to at least view our lessons during the break. Haha. Yes, Dapat talaga kasama na sya sa pang-araw araw parang paghinga mo lang eh. Dapat kasama na sa sistema. Hindi yung parang syang toxin na gusto mong diarrhea or Parang pagkain na kapag busog or fully loaded ka na pwede mo na isuka.

Oonga pala,magmamanual pa.Draw here and there.Feeling artist ka pa during christmas break. Astig din kasi nahasa pa drawing skills mo. Kung pwede na ring isama sa wishlist sa exchanges gift ang services ng pagdraw ng manual mo,okay din sana no?

Nevertheless, we should still enjoy the studying process per se and to feel life. Do not die while living your dream. Yes i know, you will see yourself studying this day during the holiday break before new year pero need mo din kasi maumpisahan para maenjoy mo ang New year at Christmas ng walang hawak na libro,trans o papel. Nakakaanxious din. \

 

Dapat maenjoy mo din ang Pasko at bagong taon kasama ang pamilya because next time mamimili ka na kung alin jan ang icecelebrate mo sa labas ng hospital kapag nagduty ka na; or worse, parehas yan absent ka sa noche buena o media noche dahil nakadeck kana.  This is also the first Christmas that I was not able to give gifts na never nangyayari because of the lack of time. (Yun,sad lang.HUhu)

Gone are the days I expect gifts under our Christmas tree.(Because this year and maybe for the next(?), we do not have it because I had no time and ako talaga ang nagpuput up nun,pero nakbawi sa other christmas decors) Again, gone are the days I expect gifts under our Christmas tree, I still think though that the education I have right now is my everyday Christmas gift. If only I could wish Santa to give me good grades, kahit yun na lang.haha

 

Btw,Do you know what the challenging thing is? It is not anymore an issue of spending the holiday season to rest or whatso but it is to make up for the time that  was lost during the school days like catching up with friends, doing errands for the family and looking for some greater cause in which you can offer your hand. You know to yourself that you need to help especially if you have family business or at least have a general cleaning of the house. So, time management and prioritization is really the key.(Alam na ng lahat yan.)

 

 

Yun lang for now.Ihahabol ko lang tong trans for 2015.

 

 

 

 

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You just have to start somewhere.


The year is about to end and just like what everybody claims,  it has taught us a lot of lessons: Lessons that we learned by ourselves or vicariously.  Maybe this is not the only year that we gained those insights but this is probably one of those times when we appreciate what we learned for the last 365 days; and with that, we hope that it will make us improved individuals for the coming year.

The year 2015 has been a good year for me not because everything that happened was good all throughout (There is no such life as that.How would you know happiness,when there is no sorrow?) but it taught me how to STRUGGLE,or let me give a better term,STRIVE,for the things that I want in my life.This is indeed a year full of beginnings for me. Here are some of  the lessons I learned and the insights that help me made it through and i want to share them with you:

 

1.If you want something,you just really have to start somewhere. If that means you have to start from scratch(especially if you do not have the anything to begin with), weigh your options or do some trial and error, do it. Because every beginning is really difficult (Remember an object at rest will remain at rest, unless an outside force is acted upon it ), this takes a great deal of energy or force, and that should come from  YOU. You just need to lift your butt and work your ass off

2.We can only do what we can with what have to do best of our abilities given the circumstances. There is no perfect life, but we,as humans, are only capable to manipulate things that we are in control of. We cannot have everything in favor of us most of the times.Just like what John green said in his book the fault in our stars,”The world is not a wish-granting factory”. Reality bites!If you do not know what to do,just be silent and pray.

3.You will feel tired,physically and emotionally.Rest,Sleep,take vitamins. Cry your heart out or Hug someone. Do not forget that your body is your vessel and it still needs to be taken care of. Even if your will power is strong,if your body is already giving up, you cannot go on further. Nevertheless, mental and emotional health are also equally important. There are times that I almost wanted to give up because I was tired of exerting my effort of always taking chances as well as burnt out of hoping. ( But then again, to tell you, if we think of how much we want to achieve our goals,we then realign our set of priorities.(I was lucky that my efforts paid off)

4.Time is gold. But Prioritize and balance. This is easier said than done. There will always be pressure everywhere that demands reorganization of your priorities. Time is so gold that we cannot afford it. There will be a time for work, studies and family.But we often forget that the time for rest and recreation is also gold. (This is what I often tell myself) Strive to balance. Life is short and remember not to be that busy that you totally forget how to live.

5.Invest in People. I know, the world is full of crappy people that makes you lose your faith in humanity. We do not want to invest deep feelings that we end up being hurt,alone and taken for granted.Talking about love?Yes. But that is also what happens in different modus operandi that entails acquisition of trust. But there are still evidences that shows people’s genuine intention to others . However,still strive to be kind even if others are not. Always try to see the good in others . Appreciate different kind of people. Never attempt to please others because you will most likely fail.We are entitled of different opinions. Others enjoy healthy arguments and debate but most people consider it as aggression. Know your people.


6.Plan to Challenge yourself. This year is full of surprises that I want to thank for.Not all plans are followed. And contrary to the common belief that if you plan,it is less likely to happen.(For barakada getaways,most of the times.) But Plan anyway.While others can set their plans on their mind, it still helps that we list what we want to achieve. Write it. Post it.(But not on your FB wall).Create a bucketlist or New years’ resolutions. It may be a cliche or may sound passe as they may say.(because it is either you only follow what you listed on the 1st tries or you never do it all. You and only you can make things happen.If it is written and posted there is a higher chance that it will happen because you are reminded to do it.Plus, it feels so awesome to check it one by one and see a fully checked list in the end of the year. (Make sure your goals are realistic though. But if you really are ambitious, you can make steps for it.If there is a will there is a way:)


7.We live in a world who runs people and not in a world being ran by people. Never let go of your values. This is a challenge to us . To become who we are is really difficult because the world changes us and our views with regards to everything and even in beauty. Technology has changed our morals,The effort exerted are lessened. The genuineness are oftentimes doubted and Even our belief to the existence of God.But never doubt,my friend.Do not always go with the flow.  Pause.Reflect. Stick to your values. It does not mean that everyone think it is correct, it is 100% correct.


8.Money is important but it sometimes invalidates happiness and sincerity.  You would not know if your friends are true  if you have it.Take it away and see it from there. Yes,It gives convenience. It gives you purchasing power that leads to living life with happiness.  How would you live without spending a penny. Even every move,you will have to spend money.How can you afford to enjoy life.It is also important in maintaining relationships. Many  relationships are also dissolved by Financial constraints. Before you build up a family, it is important that you already have earned for it. However,never lose sight of what is important. Do not be materialistic.Think about aiming for financial freedom.


9.Explore. Experience variety.You are given gifts and senses to explore the world. You are not meant to stay in front of the computer, working with your desk or studying inside the classroom. Life is meant to be experienced and lessons are applied outside. Do not confine yourself inside a box. Train yourself to see the gold everywhere. Appreciate.


10.You are you. You might have insecurities but do not wish to become somebody else because things may have become differently if you are on another’s shoes.You might be bashed, bullied and lose your confidence at times. You know yourself than others. You do not owe everyone an explanation because like you they have their own perceptions and if they do not want you and they can always choose to think ill about you. Just act in a way that when somebody says bad about you no one will believe it. You are a human and bound to make mistake, but of course, strive for greatness.

 

Life is short. Do whatever that makes you happy. Make sure you live it well and that you do not live vicariously.  You are expected to make your own path.You are allowed to make mistakes because No one is taught on how to live life and you just have to learn from it.

 

*note to self